Oh to be one of the cool kids...

I never was. One of the cool kids, I mean. Mostly because no matter where I was, at school or at play or running around the neighbourhood, my mum was never far away with her nose rag.

Thanks, Mum.

The cool kids were that other group, the ones who wore their mussed-up scrunchie ponytails to the side and talked about boys instead of playing jacks. They never wore Barbie plasters over scraped knees or had to walk their little siblings home, they just somehow escaped all those minor humiliations that the rest of us had to deal with.

I. Was. Jealous.

Of course, we all grow up. The dorky kids become smart, able adults, while the cool kids stay trapped in a time warp. At least, this is what I tell myself.

Grown-up 80s cool kids: the only creatures below Courtney Love on the evolutionary ladder.

Now the cool kids are the hipster types. You know the ones. Jutting one hip out while spouting ironicisms, sipping espresso and riding their vintage Vespas.

OK, so maybe there are a lot of cliches associated with coolness. But what I love is that you can be considered hip for making unexpected clothing choices. Gumboots with sundresses, that kind of thing. And today's garment is definitely one for the cool kids.

At first I passed it over as just a bit of tweed. But as I moved down the racks, it haunted me. Until, finally, I had to go back, and then it struck me. Fuck, this is awesome! Over a pretty-pretty chiffon dress, or with stovepipe jeans and nothing underneath but a killer rack. It's so unique. So eccentric. So precisely what vintage is all about.

You know you want it...

And OK, yes, now I'm gushing. But I only do it when it's truly justified, honest!

Anyhoo, clickety-click your way to TradeMe to bid:
http://www.trademe.co.nz/Browse/Listing.aspx?id=262695840&ed=true

Deets below, meanwhile remember: cool kids don't do drugs. Or something.

Love and ironicisms,
The Vintage Madam.

Size on label:	N/S
Modern size:	Pretty much free-size since it doesn't close in front
Label:	Flora Kolon Mode
Condition:	Great; some fading on the piping, which looks rustic
Fabric:	Wool
Closure:	None; you could pin it if you wanted
Measurements:	(all taken with garment lying flat)
Armpit-to-armpit:	48cm
Waist:	45cm
Length:	49cm shoulder-to-hem
Features:	Leaf design at left shoulder

Fedora? I hardly knew 'er! Yuk yuk! (Oh god. Sorry.)

Today I spent 45 minutes on my lipstick.

To some, this would be considered unreasonable. After all, in that amount of time, I could write a letter to a friend, cook and eat a delicious breakfast, or squeeze in a workout. But really: my friends know I love them, I like my daily Weetbix mush eaten at the traffic lights, and as for workouts, the gym has banned me since I put stilleto holes in the mat of their treadmill. :(

So I have a little time in the mornings, and today I had one of those iron-strong, can't-ignore-it whims to go noir. Yes, I pulled on my best back-seam stockings, slipped into a pencil skirt, and dug out a delicious silk pussy-bow blouse. All that was missing was the lips.

Scarlet. Matt. Colour so densely pressed into my lips, in so many layers, so meticulously blotted and re-blotted, that some lucky funeral home shall have to apply nothing when I die in 50 years. These are va-va-voom lips, ripe and red as poison apples, just begging to be bitten.

Is this some kind of subconscious vampire fantasy brought on by the recent Twilight release? No. I'm not twelve. My noir whim was prompted by the sight of today's femme fatale hat, a slick latte-hued wool fedora just begging to be slung low over one eye. Wear recommendation: adopt an air of superiority, then just add Robert Mitchum.*

The linkies are:
TradeMe: http://www.trademe.co.nz/Clothing/Womenswear/Accessories/Hats-caps/auction-256372767.htm
Twitter: http://twitter.com/vintagemadam

Until tomorrow, guys and dolls.

Love and lipstick,
The Vintage Madam.


*I take no responsibility for Robert Mitchum being dead or otherwise unavailable.

Modern size:	One size fits all
Label:	Wetherall
Condition:	Good as new
Fabric:	100% wool
Features:	Lush latte colour, indent on top

The Money Coat

I don't know what the weather's doing where you are, but I am in Auckland. 'Nuff said.

We are theoretically 11 days away from summer, and yet the drizzle continues unabated. Despite all efforts to end winter, it soldiers on: like a run in pantyhose, or a trill in a Mariah Carey song, it's unconquerable.*

But there are a few upsides to this unseasonable iciness. Perhaps you like to indulge in some late November hot chocolates, or light the occasional evening fire. Personally, I like to wear coats. Into December. Rain or no rain.

Actually it's not just a long-winter phenomenon - my friends have been complaining about my excessive coatedness for years. Like drunk singletons stumbling out of a bar, I'll take 'em single- or double-breasted, in any shape or size, no matter how green or grey they might be. Yes folks, I'm a coataholic.

And why not? They are the perfect way to look chic on those days when you're too lazy / hungover to give a crap about what you wear... just add belt and heels, and you have a Vogue-ready ensemble. It's like Dressing for Dummies.

So what do I have for you today? Well I'm glad you ask. Today's coat is the kind you see on powerful Wall Street women in movies. Heavy, camel-toned, rich, just screaming money - even the lining is gold. And the label? You can find other pieces from London Affair in the fashion collection at Te Papa. (Seriously!) All in all, this coat is what I call an I'm-better-than-you garment, best worn to high school reunions and dominatrix sessions.

Curious? Check out the pics over at TradeMe: http://www.trademe.co.nz/Clothing/Womenswear/Vintage-retro/Size-14/auction-255265784.htm

And remember to add me on Twitter: http://twitter.com/vintagemadam

That's it for today, wishing you all a hot chocolatey weekend!

Double-breastedly yours,
The Vintage Madam.

*A run in pantyhose can be stopped by applying clear nail polish. I'm curious to test whether the same is true of Ms Carey's mouth.

Size on label:	12
Modern size:	14-16
Label:	London Affair (made in NZ)
Condition:	Almost perfect; a few tiny pinprick holes in the lining
Fabric:	Not specified; either wool or wool/cashmere
Closure:	Six buttons; double-breasted
Measurements:	(all taken with garment lying flat)
Armpit-to-armpit:	53cm
Waist:	51cm
Hips:	57cm
Length:	125cm (to mid-calf on an average height woman)
Features:	Fully lined in gold satin; two front pockets